Dear Predatory Vanity Press…

Standard

I keep getting this email:

“Last Chance to Submit to [a well-known vanity press]:

Stant,
I haven’t heard from you, or received a copy of your manuscript for our free review, so I wanted to check with you one more time to see if you are still interested in becoming a published author.”

Dear predatory vanity press,

Yes. You got me. The reason I haven’t submitted my recently copyrighted installment in my well-acclaimed Ansible series to you for your free review as a first step prior to paying you massive amounts of money to ‘publish’ it and then buying copies from you to sell to all my family and friends…is because I have no interest in being a published author. You have clearly grasped, with perfection, my motives in not responding to your repetitive solicitations.

Stant Litore

P.S. You might Google the authors you’re spamming…

P.P.S. Also, about that line in your email that reads, “At [ ] Publishing we are committed to forming a personal relationship with you.” Yes, doubtlessly, except for the part where you have no clue who I am.

I can’t believe I keep getting email from these jokers. To my readers and followers of my blog, I know the snarky tone here is unlike me, but in this one instance I won’t ask your pardon. These subsidy publishers that prey on the naivete and hopes and dreams of young authors to turn a quick buck at their expense (while still being clueless enough, clearly, to include established authors in their mailing list) infuriate me.

If you are an aspiring writer and you get contacted out of the blue by a publisher or an agent, make sure to Google them! Check sites like Writer Beware. Do your research. Don’t leave your novel alone with a known predator.

Stant

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